On August 1st, I shared the following on Facebook.
It was the most shared and commented upon post I’ve ever written. More popular than my world race adventures, my engagement announcement or even my wedding photos. Turns out people were touched by the sharing of my pain. So, I thought it appropriate to share my words with you here, as well. This was how the story of my loss began to unfold, publicly.
August 1, 2016
Friends & Family,
I have sad news to share.
I had been waiting to post a blog about this, but it’s been taking me longer than planned…as most things do. So, I’m opting to invite you into the story that’s playing out in my life, right here.
Today, was going to be our ‘Gender Reveal’.
At 15 weeks.

My mom had a flight to be here, the Dr’s appt was scheduled, and my best friend and I had several creative ideas on the cutest way to reveal whether Seth and I would be having a baby boy or a baby girl.

But there’s no party scheduled for today.

We found out 3 weeks ago that we wouldn’t be having a party.

We lost the baby at 11 weeks.

And my heart still hurts from that news.

I asked Mom to reschedule her flight, we packed our party ideas away in the ‘baby box’, and I guess the Dr’s office cancels future appointments when this happens. Which is why they won’t schedule you more than two appointments out, because…well… “anything can happen.”

And they were right.

A mentor encouraged me early on to call it a baby. “Don’t call it a pregnancy,” she said. “It’s a baby.” And I’m glad I took her advice.

We didn’t just end a pregnancy, we lost a baby. We lost a loved one. A very loved one, just… a loved one we hadn’t met yet. A loved one that we’d been daydreaming about, praying for, planning for, and expecting.

No…saying “I lost a pregnancy” just would not cut it.

We lost a baby. And all the hopes and expectations that come with it.

I share this with you not for your pity, but to share my heart with you. And maybe even encourage you if you’ve been wrestling through some pain. You’re not alone.
I do intend to write a blog – and I will share that with you when I do.   (5 weeks later, these words finally made it onto a blog!)
In the meantime, I wanted to invite you into my story. And to let you know that I still believe God is good and I’m holding out for hope to build again.

I think that’s really the only way to heal.

Thanks so much for your prayers and encouragement.

Near or far, I’m blessed to have you in my life.