My mom had a flight to be here, the Dr’s appt was scheduled, and my best friend and I had several creative ideas on the cutest way to reveal whether Seth and I would be having a baby boy or a baby girl.
But there’s no party scheduled for today.
We found out 3 weeks ago that we wouldn’t be having a party.
We lost the baby at 11 weeks.
And my heart still hurts from that news.
I asked Mom to reschedule her flight, we packed our party ideas away in the ‘baby box’, and I guess the Dr’s office cancels future appointments when this happens. Which is why they won’t schedule you more than two appointments out, because…well… “anything can happen.”
And they were right.
A mentor encouraged me early on to call it a baby. “Don’t call it a pregnancy,” she said. “It’s a baby.” And I’m glad I took her advice.
We didn’t just end a pregnancy, we lost a baby. We lost a loved one. A very loved one, just… a loved one we hadn’t met yet. A loved one that we’d been daydreaming about, praying for, planning for, and expecting.
No…saying “I lost a pregnancy” just would not cut it.
We lost a baby. And all the hopes and expectations that come with it.
I think that’s really the only way to heal.
Thanks so much for your prayers and encouragement.